You know that game you play at the dinner table where everyone tells their high and low of the day? Yeah. I seem to have a lot of both highs and lows in rapid succession as of late.
Last Thursday I reached the end of my rope. My husband had been away for weeks, I had to do laundry & pack in preparation to take the kids on a plane, I stayed up late trying to get the house in reasonable shape so I didn’t have to come home to chaos, I was exhausted because for the 3 weeks prior my happy little Houdini busted out of her swaddle every hour and 20 minutes all. night. long., and I picked that moment to become downright despondent about returning to work 5 days a week in July. And since I was busy throwing a pity party, of course I was also fat and ugly. It wasn’t pretty, and I was ready to just forfeit the money we had paid for plane tickets and spend the whole weekend at home catching up on sleep.
Fast forward 24 – no, more like 15 – hours and I was on vacation with my happy family in 75-degree sunny perfection and I remembered: This is why I work full-time. It’s not so we can feed our kids – they would never starve if I didn’t. It’s a choice. It’s for the extras that we love to give our children. It means we can save for college and go on adventures and expand their horizons and get the heck out of town once in awhile.
I find it crazy how within the span of about half a day I can go from wanting to scream in exasperation in the middle of my living room “I CAN’T BELIEVE THAT THIS IS MY LIFE!” to breathlessly whispering in wonder “I can’t believe that this is my life!”
Ahhh, the games our minds play. Ahhh, postpartum hormones. Ahhh, the High/Low cycles of life.